Funnies and Foodies: October 2025
By Jan Walsh
Giggle: Suckers and Losers
Back in That Guy’s 1980s glory days he guzzled sports drinks. After losing games of badminton to his mom, his favorite sports drink was always chilled and ready for him to drink straight from the jug. Ahh! Electrolytes.
But watching his favorite football team go soft, he wonders the cause. Is it the new NIL rules or the concocotion being poured down the players’ throats? Afterall it is not the same drink that made him the man he is today. Regardless, like many fans, he just takes it out on coach.
View All “That Guy” Toons at Culinary Cartoons
Gab: Slacker Drinks
That Guy may be obnoxious, but he is onto something. The sports drinks That Guy drank growing up had a much simpler formula than today’s drinks. They included only five ingredients: water, sugar, salt, potassium, and a natural flavor such as lemon juice. It was good for both winners and losers.
After big food bought out many of the drinks, their recipes devolved into a complex mix of words he cannot pronounce. Sugar was replaced with high fructose corn syrup (HFCS). Stabilizers and artificial ingredients were added. Beyond water and salt, and natural flavors, today’s sports drinks include monopotassium phosphate, modified food starch, glycerol ester of rosin, gum Arabic, artificial flavors, artificial colors including food dyes, and sucrose acetate isobutyrate. Is this stuff good for anyone?
Goods: Do It Himself
That Guy invent his own organic Glory Days Ade! He says that making it is such a workout in itself, so no need to exercise otherwise.
TG’s Glory Days Ade Recipe
Ingredients:
¼ Cup freshly squeezed, organic lime juice
¼ Cup freshly squeezed, organic lemon juice
1 Cup organic coconut water
1 Cup Sans purified water
1 teaspoon organic raw honey
Dash of sea salt
Preparation:
Shake all ingredients together and store in a sealed glass container refrigerator or cooler. Keeps up to one week. Variation: Oranges can be substituted for limes to make an orange flavored drink. That Guy plans to make a barrel and take it down to the locker room for the team!